7.14.09

So today I’m sick. Yes, thank you Bethany. Haahaa…it’s what you get when you snuggle together in one very cold room every night.

Today I really fought to go to school, but the Lord pressed on me to take a day off. Now I can handle the meat sitting in our kitchen, everything being late and taking forever. But this is foreign to me.

So I woke up at 6:30 (kinda nice to sleep in, I’ll admit) and sat on the couch all day reading and drinking fake coffee (it’s called Riccoffee. It’s instant. It’s horrible.) I drifted in and out of sleep for what seemed like forever, but when I looked at the clock I saw it had been one hour and eleven minutes. Great.

So I did what an ADHD child would do, I went for a run. That didn’t go too well because I kept getting honked at or yelled at (women don’t run here) so I walked and by this time I was sweating something awful from running/being out of shape/having a fever. I decided to walk up to the dam, which is gorgeous and only four miles away. I didn’t actually make it that far, I turned around about two miles into it after realizing I had to walk just as far back to the house.

The reason I write all this is just to say that I’m learning to Sabbath. I’m learning to be and not just do. I’m learning that my Father loves me just as much when I’m on the couch blowing snot our of my face every two minutes as He does when I’m teaching in a classroom full of under-privileged kids. That’s hard for me to swallow. Being loved, I mean. Just for who I am. For just being me – His creation, in His image, fallen, broken, and being healed. Me.

And to take that a step further, He doesn’t just love us for being who we are. He values us just as much. Seem like the same thing? I don’t think it is. We have just as much value in His eyes, just as much to offer His kingdom, just as much substantial worth when I’m sleeping or eating or teaching or leading or laughing or counseling. Now that’s a different kind of love, a different kind of value, a different kind of… well, God.