A Case of the Mondays: Take One.

I'm starting something new here. I'll call it, "A Case of the Mondays." Why? Well, because I seem to have a case of them today and it's not the first time. Actually, it's rare a Monday passes without one in my mundane, miserable, unfortunate excuse for a life (utter, dry sarcasm here...which is allowed. Because it's Monday). What happens in one of these "cases" is quite discouraging. First, Monday morning arrives. I know, right? And it comes unwelcome and unabated. The alarm goes off far before the sun has risen. and along with the blasted announcement of "time to get up" comes a flooding of reminders of what the weekend did not accomplish and how very soon it is due.

And that's just the start of this glorious thing called a "Monday".

So, rather than complaining all day about how dreadful Monday has arrived again, I thought I'd blog about it. I don't have many followers, so it seems the safest place. This is how I logic it: if I complain all day to those around me, I'm discouraging all three friends I have in this world (don't comment with, "Oh, Amy. You have friends. I'm your friend!" It's Monday. Let me wallow in my despair.) Instead of ruining their Monday, I'll take my chances here, on the two people who read this blog: my momma, because she's my momma, and Katelynn, because it's a best friend requirement (Again, don't comment, "Amy, I read your blog. See? I'm commenting. Doesn't that prove that I read it?" It's Monday.Let me be miserable.). Two people dragged into the abyss of my Mondays is better than three, right?

As you'll see, my life is quite obscene and wretched on Mondays and its all I can do not to pout the week through. Sound familiar? (Mom? Don't want to drive carpool again? Katelynn, want to punch Jillian in the face for making you do the 30 Day Shred?) Feel free to leave a comment about your Monday blues as well.

So...

Dear Monday, here's 10 things I hate about you:

1) traffic. Explain to me how it takes me an hour and 13 minutes to get the kids I babysit to school, and two hours to get back. I know, I know...rush hour. Then explain to me how, if I wait in a Panara for 45 minutes, I get back to school a half an hour sooner.

2) Greek quiz in CPO. Rocking 45%, baby.

3) Burnt coffee tastes like licking the soot off the burner under the pot. And when you drink it too fast it feels like it, too.

4) Me: Tommy, do you need to go potty?
Tommy: No, Amy.
----10 minutes later----
Me: Tommy, do you need to go potty?
Tommy: No, Amy.
----10 minutes later----
Me: Tommy, do you need to go potty?
Tommy: No, Amy.
----10 minutes later----
Me: Tommy, do you need to go potty?
Tommy: No, Amy.
----10 minutes later----
Me: Tommy, do you need to go potty?
Tommy: No, Amy.
----10 minutes later----
Me: Tommy, do you need to go potty?
Tommy: No, Amy. Because I just had an accident.

5) the "jinks" game. I can't play one more time on the way to school. Whenever Daniel gets "jinks-ed" by Katerina he enjoys displaying his talent for armpit farting. It's loud and disgusting. Joy.

6) Cafeteria lasagna. Need I say more?

7)Jane Eyre looks longing at me from my book shelf, but I'm not allowed to be friends with her until summer.

8) I left my planner at home over spring break (my dad is over-nighting it tomorrow, thanks daddy!). For those of you who don't understand, that means I left my brain in Iowa.

9) I did homework over Spring break, I did. I was oober responsible. I just forgot to turn them in this morning. Being done on time isn't really what matters to Dr. Neely.

10)Lost my student ID, which means upon entering every campus building, a public safety officer will ask me for my name, my ID number and print me out a "lost student ID". This really isn't all that much of a problem (other than being time consuming and makes me quite late for class) other than the "ID" part of the ID is in small print. Above it, the large print just says "LOST STUDENT". Great.

So long, Monday. If I see you next week it'll be too soon.